The Pervasive Harm of Body Shaming and Appearance-Based Criticism in the Digital Age

"Oh! Salu, you've become so thin! Tell me, what happened? Is everything alright?" This is often the first sentence exchanged between sisters, friends, or acquaintances upon meeting. "How much weight you've gained," "How dark you've become," "What a ruined face you have," and so on.

Even worse are the comments made by others about our physical appearance. "Oh! Salu, your shoulders are so broad, and what are those eyes of yours, like sesame seeds! And your forehead looks like Tundikhel, laugh a little less or your teeth will look like spades, and you're a bit short," and so on!

The constant criticism I frequently heard from my well-wishers once caused my self-confidence to plummet. I became extremely conscious of my physical build and beauty.

I tried my best to cover my forehead. I laughed much less among my friends. But, with time and age, I developed the inner strength to digest others' criticism.

Who in this world is perfect? Everyone has a few flaws! Moreover, our well-wishers only notice those one or two flaws. Their eyes don't reach the numerous good things about us.

After all, it is because of these differences that every one of us is distinct from the billions of people in this world! That is why we are all special and unique in ourselves.

How much do others know about our physical build and appearance compared to what we know ourselves? Others have the details of every single inch of our body parts. And how could they not, as they need solid data for criticism?

Now, tell me yourselves, do we have control over what our physical build, facial features, or appearance should be? Can we change it the way we want? Although cosmetic surgery can bring some changes to our appearance and form nowadays.

But still, what other option does an ordinary person have besides accepting themselves as they are?

After all, it is because of these differences that every one of us is distinct from the billions of people in this world! That is why we are all special and unique in ourselves.

To be honest, who doesn't want to look good? That's why, in today's digital age, we try to look good and enjoy ourselves, at least in the digital world, by using apps like photo editors or filters.

This is more of a compulsion than a desire. We are forced to hide our natural appearance and form just to avoid the harsh criticism of others.

But still, do people stop criticizing us? Now it has become even easier for them. They don't have to go anywhere to criticize. Just pick up a mobile phone and type any comment they like.

Some people are naturally fat or thin. They themselves know about their physical build; how appropriate is it to keep poking them about the same thing?

Our lives are becoming more difficult day by day. Earlier, criticism was only heard upon meeting, but now we have to face both physical and virtual attacks simultaneously.

Moreover, why go far to find gossips these days! Our own well-wishers are enough. They cannot stand to see others happy. It's as if they sleep soundly only after criticizing someone's appearance or measurements.

Some people are naturally fat or thin. They themselves know about their physical build; how appropriate is it to keep poking them about the same thing?

Instead, what would it cost them to say a few kind words like, "Oh! You look much fitter than before"? But they act as if their own bank balance is decreasing.

If saying that the overweight person has lost some weight or the thin person has gained some makes them feel better, why hesitate to say it? Some suffer from facial blemishes. Some are plagued by acne. But how good is it to sting them with harsh words?

In reality, at first glance, it seems our competition is with others, but in fact, our competition is with ourselves. This means people are fighting the stress of their worldly lives every moment. When someone comments on their physical build, it makes the common person even more agitated.

One day, a video went viral on TikTok. The young woman speaking in the video was crying and attempting live suicide, saying, 'Everyone says I'm not beautiful; now there is no meaning in my living.'

Someone's body weight might be unbalanced due to thyroid issues, someone might have facial blemishes due to necessary medication, or someone's hair might be falling out. In such cases, our seemingly casual comments inflict a great deal of psychological and morale-damaging hurt on them.

It was about a year ago. We all must have heard the news that a friend staying in the same ladies' hostel murdered another friend because she thought the other was much more beautiful than her. And tell me, what extreme consequences can comments about someone's physical build and appearance lead to!

One day, a video went viral on TikTok. The young woman speaking in the video was crying and attempting live suicide, saying, 'Everyone says I'm not beautiful; now there is no meaning in my living.' In this context, it can be said that in today's virtual age, comments people receive on their social media also affect them psychologically.

The day I watched that video, I was greatly troubled by the thought of my daughter. This is because we women are very sensitive about our physical appearance. I might understand, but what about my daughter's psychology? I might also have failed to understand her psychology.

With the advent of the digital age, it is essential for us to become mentally and emotionally stronger. Otherwise, there is an equal possibility that a few comments could lead us towards depression. Social media is already increasing depression among people.

Therefore, if possible, speak kindly; if not, at least do not comment on others' physical demeanor and build. Not everyone's mental state may be the same. A small comment can lead someone with weak critical awareness towards disaster.

Let's also pay equal attention to whether our comments are hurting others.